Ah yes, the old “lose a pound per week” rule of “healthy” dieting. That, nevertheless, every commercial diet plan and book out there promises you can totally out-do. Here’s why that makes me grouchy.

Also making me grouchy: This sad girl eating broccoli and color-coordinating her outfit to that fact. Why so sad? Broccoli is delicious! Oh stock photography… Also, her otherwise empty and spotlessly clean plate is just creeping me out. Onward.