Because Dan and I don’t look like the above-pictured couple when we sit on bar stools. Ergo, science says we’re doomed.
“[Our difference in BMI] is destroying our marriage in the same way that the threat of nation-wide homosexual marriage equality is, i.e., not in any way,” is what Dan first said when I asked him to comment in this piece. Then we worried it was too political for iVillage. But not for you, dear Beauty Schoolers!