Are you 5’5″ or taller?
Between the ages of 18 and 26?
And — wait for it — “NEVER BEEN MARRIED, single, born female, NEVER given birth?”*
Congratulations, because you sound like a fine contestant for the Miss Earth Girls 2010 Pageant. All the pageant organizers need do is add “white and straight” to that list of criteria and we’ll have ourselves a party.
From the Guardian’s Environment Blog:
So, how exactly does a beauty pageant help to protect the environment? The organisers say that by “setting a legacy of beauty and responsibility, the candidates and the reigning beauty queen of Miss Earth uphold the preservation of our environment and continue to campaign for the protection of Mother Earth”. Hmmmm.
Apparently, my letter to the Environmental Movement That Hates Women got lost in the mail.
Are those the Rockettes? No they're environmental activists, silly.
*Capital letters are direct from Carousel Productions Inc’s eligibility requirements, not my sloppy writing.
2 Comments
Virginia—
I think the contestant carrying the sign
“plastics kill marine life—do not pollute our water…” should stay out of the water.
Does she realize that the plastic in her fake boobs could kill millions of fish every day?
xoxox
keep up the great work!
and yet…are we glad that they are choosing to highlight environmental issues, instead of whatever else they usually talk about? That they are using their ‘powers for good’? Because, unfortunately, there are probably ALWAYS going to be pagaents…I am not sure myself, I am just asking…
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[...] with naked chicks and Method’s creepy stalker soap-bubble ad? Oh! Not to mention the Miss Earth Girls Pageant!) We love that. You’re welcome for all the checks I write, by the way. (Please stop sending [...]